What Cis Society Didn't Say About Being a Woman

Society talks a lot about what it is like to be a woman. Yet, there are so many aspects that remain undiscussed.

There are social norms and widely accepted expectations imposed on you. When you are striving to be authentically yourself, there are many considerations that remain unexplored.

Yet, once you transition, you suddenly begin to notice all these cultural and social implications of being a woman. These changes are sometimes sudden while in other cases, they are gradual.

These are all aspects that cis women grew up with and thus, seem natural to them. However, if you transition into a woman, these may come as a surprise to you. There are upsides and downsides to this, obviously. 


To begin with, you may notice a sudden change in people’s demeanor. Especially women might become friendlier and more warm and welcoming after you transition.

While this may sound arbitrary, it could be attributed to the idea that you are no longer perceived as a threat. In general, women grow up wary of men and are taught to always remain cautious.

This is to avoid being approached when they are not romantically interested in someone. Therefore, people are friendlier if you are a woman. You no longer have to worry about being perceived as a threat or making women uncomfortable.    


When you are a woman, you are free to express your love through physical affection such as hugs and cuddles.

As a man, social rules prohibit you from engaging in this type of affection with other women, since often, it comes with other sexual and romantic expectations. Women would not be open to such behavior and understandably so.

There are certain lines you do not and should not cross with friends from the opposite gender. For men, physical affection amongst each other is extremely rare and even then, it is restricted to family.

As a trans woman, you will observe this shift when your girlfriends are more willing to hug you or cuddle with you. You can sleep on the same bed and not give a second thought about it.

Essentially, as a trans woman how you express and share love between friends will change significantly.   


Coming to the downsides, how you present yourself requires a lot more thought and effort. You need to take care of yourself and look more sorted and put together. Getting ready involves numerous steps- picking an outfit, makeup, hair, skincare, and so much more.

People are not that bothered by your appearance when you are a woman. But societal expectations and standards for women’s appearance are unbelievably high. Being a woman is high-maintenance.


 Learning how to modulate your voice as a trans woman is another excruciating task. How you talk, how you laugh, and how you communicate are things that matter significantly more all of a sudden.

You can’t just switch off the voice that you have been practicing for months. It takes constant effort and can be taxing.  


Finally, age is a significant factor for women and impacts their lives significantly. How you are perceived changes in terms of your attractiveness, maturity, and so on. As you age, your dressing sense and your presentation are also expected to change. Age brings with it several constraints for women, which is unfortunate.

However, you can try to push the boundaries if you are willing. But age will bring about some pressure when you are a woman, especially if you are still in the dating pool. Living up to a set of beauty standards that are biased towards youth can be frustrating.     

So these are some advantages and disadvantages of being a woman, if you are a trans woman who is transitioning and wondering what the implications would be. Good luck!! 

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