Learning to be A Woman MtF Transgender Lesson

As a trans woman, navigating through the world may feel strange and alien. As you transition, you become a new person and things evolve for you- socially, emotionally, and mentally.

Your experience would vary depending on the stage of transitioning you are in.

For instance, if it has been a year since you have undergone HRT, you may be at a place where you are considering dating. Navigating dating cis men as a transgender woman is like a labyrinth.

There are rules, norms, and conventions. It also comes down to preferences of both the people involved. During this stage, it is also common to wonder when you should come out to a potential date.


There is no right or wrong way to do it, but it is still a tricky position to be in.

At the later stages, it is also normal to try and adopt behaviors that are considered feminine- be it the way you move, speak, or express yourself.

Moreover, it also becomes important to be gendered properly.

After undergoing transitioning, it could be especially disappointing to be misgendered in social contexts. Therefore, at later stages, it is natural to prioritize being accurately gendered.

Once you complete transitioning internally, social transitioning often becomes pertinent. You would want the external world to valid your innate identity.  


When it comes to social transitioning, you may also observe changes in your relationship with women. It is highly likely that women become friendlier and nicer to you once you begin your transition journey.

The reason is that women treat men differently from other women. This can be attributed to the fact that women often feel unsafe around strange men, especially in secluded places.

Therefore, as you begin to transition, you would witness a shift in your dynamics with women.  


While it is undeniable that trans women have very challenging lives, your transitioning journey will also acquaint you with the hurdles that many cis women face on a daily basis, such as eve teasing and safety-related threats.

This emergence of comradery with other women might make you feel more in touch with your womanhood.

You would feel like one of them, which is undoubtedly a great experience for a transitioning trans woman.     

Trans women tend to navigate societal expectations and projections of who they are, every single day.

These perceptions often impact your day-to-day life both negatively and positively. In fact, it is common for people to misgender you without your consent.

You won’t recognize your social identity and yet it impacts your perception of who you are. 


While it is easy to claim that external validation is not important, transitioning is one phase where you will find yourself being particularly impressionable in the face of other people’s opinions.

How they perceive your gender identity often influences your idea of where you are in the journey. You may sometimes find yourself embracing other’s perceptions even if it goes against your very being. 

In fact, external validation might even accelerate your transition. It might take you some time to get used to being gendered accurately, since you would have spent your entire life being called “him.”  

You may also take some time to learn to introduce yourself as a woman as opposed to a trans person, even after transitioning.

Please note that during transitioning, be open and flexible towards your own expectations. Your ego might disagree with your external reality in the initial phases.


You will require a lot of time and effort to shed mannerisms you have built over your lifetime. Sometimes it feels like you're throwing a piece of yourself away or burning it. However, you are merely transforming.  

Initially, you develop mannerisms and behaviors based on the sex you are born into. With time, as you recognize your gender identity, you learn to pick and choose who you want to be.

You might even retain some of your old behaviors and mannerisms.  We hope this article has helped you develop your expectations. Good luck!!

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