How to Stop Being Dysphoric - MTF Transgender

Gender dysphoria is mentally excruciating for trans people. It is taxing to constantly feel uncomfortable in your own skin and feel inauthentic. It is the result of the mismatch between your biological makeup and your gender identity and trans people dedicate a lot of their time and efforts towards mitigating this gap.

This is typically achieved through transitioning. However, most people live with some dysphoria throughout their lives. There are ways to regulate these feelings of discomfort but it is important to remember that dysphoria is unique for each person.  


The cause of your dysphoria, the exact reasons for your anxiety, your thought process, and other factors might influence the extent of your feelings. They can either mitigate dysphoria or exacerbate it.

However, one particular factor that definitively does impact your dysphoria is your self-talk. It is how you programmed yourself to talk to your mind.

It is a crucial tool to sharpen. You must learn how to manipulate it in a way that soothes and pacifies your dysphoria.

Your subconscious listens to how you talk to yourself and therefore, it is important to integrate positive commentary and perceptions frequently. You can view it as perception management.  


We manage our perceptions every day as we navigate through life. Anytime we see something, we take a few moments to reflect and determine how we feel about it.

It is how humans have processed their surroundings for eons. Especially in the face of miscommunication and misinterpretation, we tend to deconstruct the entire scenario to separate facts from our own feelings.

This form of recalibration must be carried out internally on a frequent basis if you feel dysphoric. However, it is important to remember that dysphoria never goes away for some people.

That is especially why learning to live with it and manage it becomes very important. There are different levels to dysphoria and that largely depends on your transition progress and the overall journey you plan to undertake.

The measures you have been employing- intentionally or unintentionally- to reduce feelings of dysphoria also impact how you fare.  


Especially during the initial stages, dysphoria can be traumatizing and depressing. But eventually, you will begin to realize when the symptoms of dysphoria are setting in.

During such moments, it can help to pause and instruct that voice to shush. In fact, understanding that how you feel is influenced by that voice in your head is half the battle won.

Building up your tolerance and your skills to cope with the negative thoughts cropping up in your mind can decrease the effect dysphoria has on you.

On some days, you can’t quieten the voice so you might have to live through those symptoms. However, knowing that these extreme symptoms are transient might comfort you to a certain extent.     


As far as perception management goes, the first step to take is to anchor how you think a female body should look. The standards for women vary across cultures and continents.

To mitigate your dysphoria, it is pertinent to understand how you define a woman. For instance, a lot of trans women cannot separate a vagina from the definition of a woman.

Consequently, they exhibit symptoms of bottom dysphoria and might undergo bottom surgery to alleviate their distress. Our subconscious internalizes even our fleeting perceptions to construct schemas for every word we know.

Therefore, it becomes important to understand your unique perception of a woman. Some of the components can be resolved with surgery and other medical procedures, as noted above.


You can further skew your perceptions to combat dysphoria. During the first few stages of transitioning, many trans women remain dissatisfied with what they see in the mirror.

However, if you consistently tell yourself that you are seeing “her” instead of “him” and generally start using your pronouns when talking to yourself, your subconscious will gradually accept this new perception. Therefore, you are primarily in conflict with your mind when you are fighting dysphoria.   


Similarly, you can also alter your anchoring when defining your idea of a woman. The fact is that every woman is different and unique. There are tall women, short women, plump ones and those who are lean.

Not every woman has big breasts or wide hips. The more you open your eyes to these differences, the more you realize that you are not extremely skewed from other women. 


This alteration of your perceptions can help you accept your body and yourself sooner. You will find many women with body types like yours, so you can certainly pass.

Finally, positive affirmations can also go a long way in changing the narrative within your head. When you constantly tell your mind good things about your body and your appearance, it will eventually give in.  

We hope these tips help you in managing and regulating your dysphoria. Good luck!!

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